Crystal head vodka brought to you by dan aykroyd

I’m not entirely sure what to make of this.  In the following video, you will be pitched a new quadruple-distilled vodka by venerable comedic actor Dan Aykroyd, of Ghostbusters, Blues Brothers, and Saturday Night Live fame.  A vodka that, for some reason, is inside a crystal skull.

It’s hard to tell what came first in the concept pitch.  Was it:

1. “Hey guys, remember the colossal failure of the latest Indiana Jones movie?  I think we’ll all agree the only silver lining in that soul-crushing disaster was it turned people on to crystal skulls.  Seriously, the kids are going nuts for ‘em, I can’t get my kids to shut up about CRYSTAL SKULLS!  So I figure..WE should make ‘em!  We’ll figure out what to put in them later.  They’ll sell like hotcakes!”

or…

2. “You know what there isn’t too much of in the alcohol marketplace?  VODKA.  The roughly 5000 varieties available at most liquor stores of a generally flavorless spirit just isn’t enough.  The kids these days want MORE!  But how to creatively package it?  Someone’s already done the tommy gun bottle and the pirate steering wheel…we’ve got to think of something new.  Hey, did anyone see that new Indiana Jones movie?”

The world may never know the true origins of Crystal Head vodka, but thank God it’s here*.

Crystal Head Vodka via:: The Hater

*Is it weird that I secretly want one?

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  1. Marshall Said,

    WHY DAN WHY????

    Oh the humanity!!!

    (sob)

  2. Blair, aka Trader Tiki Said,

    Just found out these are real, and apparently in-stock at BevMo.

    Having a home Tiki Bar, I think this will suit the decor nicely. Though the vodka may have to be traded for something a little more punchy.

  3. DrinkPlanner Said,

    I agree that a crystal skull would definitely look good sitting back on the bar, and I imagine there’s a great deal of primal satisfaction drinking straight out of a skull-shaped bottle. It’s just such a bizarre confluence of things to come together to make this odd product.

  4. White Russian Said,

    Very odd indeed.

    Anybody know how much they cost?

  5. DrinkPlanner Said,

    $42.99 for a 750ml. You can buy it online here: https://www.hitimewine.net/istar.asp?a=6&id=167173!1166

  6. Kyle Said,

    Well, I am one of the owners of the “tommy gun bottle” shaped Vodka’s, and I can proudly say that we have 4 times distilled Super-Premium Vodka that is extremely popular in the US. It has been highly recommended by the Beverage Tasting Institute, and we didn’t even have to use Dan Akroyd’s old a@@ to promote our Vodka.
    Our’s retails for $39,99 and can be found at:
    http://www.samswine.com/on/demandware.store/Sites-SamsWine-Site/default/Search-Show?q=tommy+guns

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